To Be Alive
by Dewdropzz
Summary: The inner thoughts of Rapunzel the first time she leaves her tower. Based on and containing most of the lyrics from one of my favourite songs from the movie, "When Will My Life Begin? Reprise". :D Reviews are loved forever and rewarded with cookies! -D


Standing on the balcony of my tower, looking down at the outside world below. It's something I've been doing for eighteen years, yet, I never noticed how close it all was until now.

It all seems so big — Big and scary, and beautiful. Has the grass always been that green, or does it just look that way now because I'm seeing it up close? Are the flowers at the base of my tower really that vibrant purple? Is the stream really sparkling blue?

I'm actually not really any closer than I've ever been. It's the exact same view I've had from this tower for eighteen years, but, now it seems closer somehow. I guess it's because now I'm not just going to be looking at the view from afar. For the first time in my life, I'm going to be part of that world... Can it really be true?

"You coming, blondie?" I hear Flynn yell as he cautiously descends down my tower. He probably thinks I do this every day. A girl with seventy feet of hair who lives high up in a tower? How else would she get in and out every day, besides using her hair as a rope? Haha...

The outside world... It always seemed like another universe to me. A dark and selfish and cruel universe, as Mother always said. But to me it always looked kind of welcoming... I mean, how can anything so pretty be so terrible and dark?

I guess this is it, I'm about to find out. I've envisioned myself doing this so many times that I should be able to wrap my hair around this thing and go, without giving it another thought... Right?

Am I ready? No. Will I ever be ready? Probably not. Or maybe I've always been ready... I can feel the summer breeze pulling me forward, calling me. And you know, I think it's been calling me my entire life.

_Should I?_

_No._

_Here I go..._

I step off the balcony into thin air, and before I know it I'm lowering quickly to the ground, suspended by nothing but my seventy feet of hair. In like a split second, I find myself dangling inches above the ground. I take a deep breath, and set my bare feet down on the grass, and... I fall.

I let my body collapse, overcome with feelings — feelings of excitement, and joy and accomplishment, contentedness, and fear all at the same time. I stretch my arms and legs like a cat in a puddle of warm sunlight, and as I lay there on the cool ground, I smell the grass - the dirt - just like I dreamed they'd be. I catch the scent of wildflowers on the wind, and I know that summer breeze WAS calling me. For like the first time ever, I'm completely free!

Is this real? Can it be?

Yes, I did it! I'm free!

And _I go running_ down the hill, and my heart leaps when I go over the slope. I've never felt anything like this before!

_And racing_ the wind is the most fun thing in the world! I've never truly felt the wind before. It blows through my hair, and I wonder if this is what it feels like to be a bird flying through the sky.

_And dancing_ through the fields of wildflowers is something I've always dreamed of doing, ever since I was a little girl.

_And chasing_ the the sound of my own footsteps as my bare feet pad through the velvet green grass.

_And leaping_ like a deer — Like the ones I've seen in books, but never dreamed I'd actually have a chance to see.

_And bounding_; springing like a leapfrog! I see one by the pond and I chase it, just for the fun of it! I step into the pond — The water's so cold! It sends shivers up my legs, and down my arms, and exhilarates me.

_Hair flying_ as I run, _heart pounding_ as I reach for the sky, and the clouds and the sun!

_And reeling_ like a spinning top! I dance, and I twirl under a canopy of trees.

_And finally feeling_ with every part of my body; every fiber of my being's alive now.

...But then I realize what I've done. My mother... If she finds out, she'll kill me. And, oh my goodness, this would kill her! If she finds out, my life is over... She'll never forgive me, she'll... never trust me again.

Oh my gosh, I must be crazy! I-I have to go back. I have to get back in the tower, turn the lights on, put everything back as it was, and pretend like none of this ever happened...

But is that what I want? Of course not! I'm finally free. I want to stay out here — with the grass, and the trees, and the flowers and the pond, and the sky and the clouds, and the wind and the sun — forever .

I've... never felt torn like this before... This is all new to me. It's completely new...

Maybe these feelings are just feelings of being alive. Maybe it's good to feel these things, because it means that I'm a real person. Maybe everyone feels like this at some point in their lives. Maybe Mother does... and maybe Flynn does...

Flynn... I look at Flynn, and I know I can't turn back now.

For I, Rapunzel, am a beautiful, intelligent, strong, confident young lady... Or at least, I can pretend to be! Maybe if I pretend for long enough, I'll actually start to believe it. I read in a book once that bravery is not having no fear; it's having the courage to go out and face your fears.

I've always dreamed of being courageous... And now's the chance to prove myself, to myself!

_So I go running_,

_And racing_,

_And dancing_,

_And chasing_,

_And leaping_,

_And bounding_,

_Hair flying_,

_Heart pounding_,

_And reeling_,

_And finally feeling_:

_Now's when my life begins!_


End file.
